We can’t let fear control us, or we’ll be frozen in place. The key is to control the fear, not to let it control us.”“So, like, you’re concerned about how it will end up?” Stephanie asked. “That it could mess things up. But it could also make things better?”“Yes, that’s right. But I did a good job of messing things up by being with Becky. Just like I messed them up when I was upset with Jennifer. In fact, now that I think of it, I might have been using the situation with Jennifer in the same way. You remember what I told you?”“I do. And it hurt. A lot. But you were hurting yourself, and you were scared. I see your point, now. You let fear control you both times and bad stuff happened. It makes sense.”I took a deep breath and let it out.“What about Spring Break?” I asked.“I don’t know. Let me think about it. It’s still three weeks away. I need some time, Big Brother.”“That makes sense. I’ll give you all the time you need. And whichever way you decide, I’ll love you just as. ?Please, ma?am. What am I supposed to do?? ?Well, I?m told by your handler that you are quite tight.I?m going to work on loosening you up and on improving your posture.? Shefrowned at the younger woman. ?I expect you to stand proudly, I mean, you have the blood of a Hastings running through yourveins, after all.? She reached down and affixed a small rod to the odd lookingchair. It had no back, just a forward leaning seat and two places for one?sknees to lean against. Caroline opened up a small tin and coated the rod with aslick substance. ?Sit, down.? ?How am I sit, ma?am?? Harriet asked, genuinely puzzled. Caroline took her arm and pulled her forward. ?Place yourlegs here and rest your knees on these pads. Good, now ease back.? Harrietstopped when she felt the pressure on her back door. ?Keep going, you?re doingfine.? ?How?? ?Press out slightly as you press down.? With steady encouragement, Harriet eased herself onto theanal plug. Feeling strangely full, she glanced up at the woman.
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